Story Time from Space (Force): Pt. 3

The cast of Space Force pool their improvisational talents to craft a work of experimental fiction.

24 July 20202 min read

It’s not often that a cast as sharp and imaginative as that of Space Force comes along. That’s why Queue asked some of the series’ stars to show off their creative chemistry in three rounds of a classic improv game. Over the course of the last few weeks, we’ve posted the absurdist stories that resulted. Here we present the final installation, inspired by the words “pinot noir.”

Ben Schwartz, John Malkovich, Diana Silvers, Jimmy O. Yang, Tawny Newsome

From top left: Ben Schwartz, John Malkovich, Diana Silvers, Jimmy O. Yang, Tawny Newsome

Pinot Noir

Every night I look upon the stars and I think about pinot noir [1]. I’ve been going to a local liquor store where they don’t really sell good wine. They don’t really sell anything that’s over $10. So I’ve just been drinking local Steel Reserve malt liquor [2]. And frankly it suits me, because I don’t think I deserve fineries in life. No, I don’t. Not since what I did to Helen oh so many years ago. She deserves so much better than that terrible thing I did to her [3].

Art by Worry Lines

What’s that at the door? She’s knocking right now? Helen, no! Helen, get away! But she bursts right in with a bottle of pinot noir [4].

Art by Worry Lines

I only started drinking in my late 30s, although I did go out with a cheerleader in high school once. It was New Year’s. She drank an entire bottle of Mad Dog 20/20. And I threw up green beans through my nose. Her parents forbade me to date her, because they thought I was a bad influence [5].

Art by Worry Lines

And then I met Helen, and Helen was different. Her parents didn’t mind that I drank and threw up green beans [1]. Her parents actually loved me for it, unlike mine. My parents were never supportive of me drinking or acting or anything [2].

Art by Worry Lines

“Stop reminiscing,” Helen interrupts. “Here, this is a peace offering. I’m so mad about the thing you did to me before, which we will not mention. But I brought you a bottle of pinot noir ’cause I know you only drink trash from your local liquor store. Let’s bury the hatchet [3].”

Art by Worry Lines

[1] Ben Schwartz
[2] John Malkovich
[3] Diana Silvers
[4] Jimmy O. Yang
[5] Tawny Newsome